• partner: you be the teacher ill be the student ;)
  • me: okay
  • me: write an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. i want it on my desk by monday
  • partner: oh no but... thats such a hard essay... is there anything i can do for extra credit? ;)
  • me: no
  • partner: but professor.... surely then i could... persuade you to extend the deadline...? ;)
  • me: no
  • partner: so... what do you want, professor?? ;)))
  • me: an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. on my desk. by monday

blackfemalepresident:

you deserve to be in a relationship with a person who doesnt make you compete for their affection and never has you guessing where you stand with them

(via it-takestime)

sniffing:

do u ever accidentally slam the door on your parents after an argument and then have to sit there praying to god to help u through the ensuing shit storm that you know is about to go down

(via wh33ping3y3s)

intrauterine:

"Depression is such a cruel punishment. There are no fevers, no rashes, no blood tests to send people scurrying in concern. Just the slow erosion of the self, as insidious as any cancer. And, like cancer, it is essentially a solitary experience. A room in hell with only your name on the door."

(Source: thissickwonderland, via wh33ping3y3s)

dilemmemily:

one time we got a new kid in fifth grade and he walks right in and sticks his hand under the stapler and staples his hand and just looks at the teacher and goes “I’m going to the nurse” and leaves

(via not-living-but-alive)

californstar:

My anaconda don’t wanna go to class tomorrow

(via sleepingwithymas)

  • straight couple: *make out in public at random intervals in weird places*
  • straight couple: *grabs each other's asses in public*
  • straight couple: *are not in any way inconspicuous about the fact that they are feeling each other up in public*
  • gay couple: *holds hands in public*
  • straight people: that is VILE and it is CORRUPTING my entire FAMILY. my grandmother is crying. my children have all shit their pants at the same time. WHO WILL THINK OF THE CHILDREN